You are loved

I usually don’t get triggered by celebrities that passed away, I pay my respects and hope for the best in the future. Until yesterday, June 20th, 2017, I saw a post by TMZ and cried like a baby that hit his head on a coffee table corner. Flashback of my teenage years, young adult and already grown up years. Chester Bennington took his life. For last two days all I can listen to is Linkin Park, I was planning to see them with their latest album.

I want to use this moment to share how he saved me ( and a lot of others ).

Sure there are fans that stopped after Meteora being fans and listening to Linkin Park. I did not. I remember very well the moment in my life I saw Crawling on TV. I was somewhere around 11 years old, growing up in a village in Croatia, playing at my friends house that was cool enough to have German programs ( including MTV ). That one moment I saw Crawling starting and it caught my eye and ear. By age of 13 I knew every Hybrid Theory song by heart. My English was well enough to understand and scream the words. I got my hands on Hybrid Theory cassette, that’s how old I am. And from that moment on I grew with Linkin Park. While everyone left the fanbase with the third album, I did not. I love Minutes to Midnight, it is my favorite Linkin Park album. With Thousand Suns and Living Things albums changing the sounds I still loved their music, because again, as they were changing I was too, I was growing up, I am not the same teenage kid, I was at that point a young adult that was okay with saying that I like all sorts of music, you might think at that point I only liked metal or rock but it was okay to be more liberal and not to be ashemed of who you are and what you like.

With all that, it was more than a band, it is the special bond between me and my youngest brother. We were the weird ones out of 4 kids and LP made it feel okay, finding him rocking to the same music made me feel less alone. We both grew up and moved on but that one thing stayed the same. We could always reconnect whenever. I was 25 when I moved to Canada and that was in early 2015. In December 2014, I got a message on Facebook from my brother that LP is coming to Amsterdam, and the moment the tickets went into pre sale he got them. I never felt more connected and like I belong somewhere. It was the Hunting Party tour and it was the best day of my life. It was just before I started to have a taste of a grown up life on my own.

They made a mark on my generation and I thank them for that. I am sorry it ended like this. I am sorry no one was anble to see what was going on. As I am listening through the albums, most songs are a call for help, and that is how lot of my generation connected to it and stayed alive thank to that. Now I wonder, how will I get old and what will keep us going.

This is my story how Linkin Park influenced my life and will be close to my heart.

I hope new genrations have their heroes like I did mine.

My prays go to Chester’s family and rest of the band and I hope we get through this as one.

Don’t forget that every life matters and you are loved, I love you, I might not know you but I don’t have to know that you are living this life for a purpose.

When my time comes fforget the wrong that I’ve done, help me leave behind some reasons to be missed – Leave Out All The Rest from album Minutes to Midnight

With Love


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